Black Chicks with Blonde Hair and White Girl Bootys in the Bizarro World
I’m bored as Driz is at a meeting and I can’t waste time shooting the shit so now you must suffer my random thoughts…..
I go to lunch and order a tuna sandwich ($4.00). I feel a little hot so why not, I break the norm and get a bottle of vitamin water to serve as my semi-desert (usually I drink water). I love keeping lunch within 4 dollars in Manhattan, it makes me feel like I’m saving something (like Im listening to Mom). I get to the register and…
he says 6.25.
Wait a minute, the water was 2.00!
Yep
I’m getting flashes of “Falling Down”. Pipty cents!!
You Go! No I Stay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The principle was all fucked up. Vitamin water should be 1.25 – 1.50 at the most. I mean it’s the principle. If you don’t make a stand, then nothing will change (or economically speaking if you don’t decrease demand, the price stays high) – I’m getting to deep here.
I said no thanks which really meant your fucking price is too high and walked to another deli. Vitamin Water 2 dollars – I’m in the Bizarro World.
I decide I’ll drink water if I can’t find what I want but now its gone beyond the grape loveliness I wanted and its personal. I WANT THE RIGHT PRICE
I stop in a Duane Read and pick up the V. Water – 1.50, with tax 1.72. Too much but I take it. All in All I spent 6 dollars on lunch but for some reason this whole thing pissed me off.
Maybe I just like living Angry.
Things I don’t Get About Black People? Hey wait a minute – I’m Black
Why is there a Black Music Month, no one else has a month dedicated to their music so why should we?
Why am I sized up every time I go to the deli? For that matter why should I have to watch my back every time I want milk?
If everyone complains about people being too ghetto, why are their ghetto people?
Why when we’re angry do we get louder and louder on the street – no one wants to hear our shit.
Why do I feel the need to blast my music in the car – I do it all the time and I don’t know why.
These things all happened today and last night but I’m sure there’s about 5 hundred I’m missing. And if you’re one of my white brothers, trust me, you don’t get it - but I’ll get at you later with my Things I definitely will NEVER get about White People..
Things I find attractive in women lately
Blond hair on black women – see the ghetto comment, I can’t get away.
Breasts – their everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (gotta love the summer)
White chicks with big bootys
Black chicks with big bootys
Asian chicks with – well you get it.
Spanish women who are not from NY – I think I’m done with Newyorreckans for a while.
Did I mention Indian chicks with big bootys.
Speaking of Bootys, I was with one of my friends from Law school the other day and we decided to explore what I call the white girl phenomenon. Why is it that (except for circumstances like Angelina Jolie) the white girls I find attractive he (being a young strapping white man) finds horrible. He tells me I’m always picking fat white girls to point out. I thought deeply about this. I know what fat is – O I’ve seen fat – and the girls I’m picking are not fat, I think their about normal. I guess my normal is black girl normal which is thick not white normal which is small. Maybe it’s a cultural thing but I like thighs and booty not stick figures. He says I like ripples. I don’t though – it’s a mystery but at least he’s no comp for me which means we can go to the bar with no problem.
Deadwood – I love this show. The language is great and Swerigin (forever known here as Swergin) is without a doubt the man. In fact I think I love all the characters from Seth to Sci. I really appreciate the way HBO takes risks in its programming. Original programming is the only way to keep things fresh – (please see the success of LOST). I thought I would hate a story about the wild old west where everyone that looks like me are slaves and white heros are idealized but I don’t, I love it. Cuddos to HBO.
I guess I better get back to work – now I’ve got bootys on the mind.
***
Yaaaa, I’m going to need you to come in on Saturday.
I go to lunch and order a tuna sandwich ($4.00). I feel a little hot so why not, I break the norm and get a bottle of vitamin water to serve as my semi-desert (usually I drink water). I love keeping lunch within 4 dollars in Manhattan, it makes me feel like I’m saving something (like Im listening to Mom). I get to the register and…
he says 6.25.
Wait a minute, the water was 2.00!
Yep
I’m getting flashes of “Falling Down”. Pipty cents!!
You Go! No I Stay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The principle was all fucked up. Vitamin water should be 1.25 – 1.50 at the most. I mean it’s the principle. If you don’t make a stand, then nothing will change (or economically speaking if you don’t decrease demand, the price stays high) – I’m getting to deep here.
I said no thanks which really meant your fucking price is too high and walked to another deli. Vitamin Water 2 dollars – I’m in the Bizarro World.
I decide I’ll drink water if I can’t find what I want but now its gone beyond the grape loveliness I wanted and its personal. I WANT THE RIGHT PRICE
I stop in a Duane Read and pick up the V. Water – 1.50, with tax 1.72. Too much but I take it. All in All I spent 6 dollars on lunch but for some reason this whole thing pissed me off.
Maybe I just like living Angry.
Things I don’t Get About Black People? Hey wait a minute – I’m Black
Why is there a Black Music Month, no one else has a month dedicated to their music so why should we?
Why am I sized up every time I go to the deli? For that matter why should I have to watch my back every time I want milk?
If everyone complains about people being too ghetto, why are their ghetto people?
Why when we’re angry do we get louder and louder on the street – no one wants to hear our shit.
Why do I feel the need to blast my music in the car – I do it all the time and I don’t know why.
These things all happened today and last night but I’m sure there’s about 5 hundred I’m missing. And if you’re one of my white brothers, trust me, you don’t get it - but I’ll get at you later with my Things I definitely will NEVER get about White People..
Things I find attractive in women lately
Blond hair on black women – see the ghetto comment, I can’t get away.
Breasts – their everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (gotta love the summer)
White chicks with big bootys
Black chicks with big bootys
Asian chicks with – well you get it.
Spanish women who are not from NY – I think I’m done with Newyorreckans for a while.
Did I mention Indian chicks with big bootys.
Speaking of Bootys, I was with one of my friends from Law school the other day and we decided to explore what I call the white girl phenomenon. Why is it that (except for circumstances like Angelina Jolie) the white girls I find attractive he (being a young strapping white man) finds horrible. He tells me I’m always picking fat white girls to point out. I thought deeply about this. I know what fat is – O I’ve seen fat – and the girls I’m picking are not fat, I think their about normal. I guess my normal is black girl normal which is thick not white normal which is small. Maybe it’s a cultural thing but I like thighs and booty not stick figures. He says I like ripples. I don’t though – it’s a mystery but at least he’s no comp for me which means we can go to the bar with no problem.
Deadwood – I love this show. The language is great and Swerigin (forever known here as Swergin) is without a doubt the man. In fact I think I love all the characters from Seth to Sci. I really appreciate the way HBO takes risks in its programming. Original programming is the only way to keep things fresh – (please see the success of LOST). I thought I would hate a story about the wild old west where everyone that looks like me are slaves and white heros are idealized but I don’t, I love it. Cuddos to HBO.
I guess I better get back to work – now I’ve got bootys on the mind.
***
Yaaaa, I’m going to need you to come in on Saturday.
posted by JamicaVanWyck at 12:23 PM
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